Why am I such a cold person

The human being is an affective animal, who needs to relate, love and be loved. Under these premises we build families, social relationships and society. What happens to those people cold people who do not fit in this reality? In most cases they are not understood and are seen as strange and unreliable people.

But what is behind this attitude? What are the causes of a cold personality? If sometimes you look in the mirror and you wonder why I am such a cold person in the following article we explain it to you.

Are you really a cold person?

The personality is not like the color of the eyes or the tone of the skin, it is not something that comes marked in our genes and remains unalterable, but what has happened to us in our life, our fears, our experiences and everything that It has influenced us in the way we see the world and how we act in it.

The way in which they have learned to show affection, traumatic situations that have caused them to close themselves, defense mechanisms to not be vulnerable, etc., the causes for someone to become a cold person can be many, however It is not normal for someone to be cold always and with everyone, the human being is made to be emotional .

If you think you are a very cold person or think someone is, analyze your actions and your way of acting. If you notice, you will observe that perhaps with small children or with animals you are able to show all the affection that you do not show your parents or your partner. This happens because you do not allow yourself to suffer, it's something that scares you. With children or animals you feel that you do not suffer any danger because they are not capable of harming you, while the rest of the world does see it as a possible source of suffering and you want to get away.

Being closed is not being cold

Sometimes we talk about very cold people when they are really people who are not able to show their feelings. There are very few people unable to feel anything, unable to feel love and affection. Most cases of "cold people" are actually cases of people with little ability to express their feelings or emotions.

Usually it is habitual, unlike what they show outwardly, that these people have an intense emotional life that they keep for themselves and that they are unable to show outside. When we say that a person is cold, we speak of someone who is incapable - or who has a hard time - feeling emotions. These cases are counted, so we recommend you self-examine to clarify if this is really your case or, on the contrary, the only thing that happens is that you have a hard time opening and showing your affection and feelings with words or actions.

A childhood lack of affection, a cold adult life

Love, affection, showing attention and emotions is something we learn over the years, through imitation and repetition, looking at how people around us do it. This being so, it is not strange that the lack of affection in childhood and in the first stages of life is one of the main causes of you being a cold person.

It is very normal that when parents have not been able to show affection to their children, or have not had enough time to be with them and show them, those children grow up with deficiencies when it comes to showing their emotions.

A child who has been deprived of affection is very likely that, once adult, is a cold and closed person, with many difficulties, and not only to show their feelings, but also to decipher their emotions and give them a sense.

Fear of being damaged

Why am I such a cold person? Surely, if you reflect on how you are and what your life has been like, you will find the keys to answering this question. Apart from the keys already mentioned, there is a reason that causes many people to lock themselves up and not show their feelings; the fear of being hurt

The fear that the rest do not feel the same, the fear of being rejected, the fear to suffer emotionally, the fear of not being accepted, all these fears make that person build a breastplate of cold and silence that they see as a way to protect yourself against these fears .

Many times, this coldness is a mask that over the years and the habit has become its true face, although with work it can be reversed. This is the way in which they believe that the world sees them strong and respectable, the way to avoid being harmed, not going too far to know anyone so as not to give them the ability to hurt you.