How to stop being shy

Do you feel something uncomfortable every time you go to a social event? Do you get extremely nervous when you have to talk to someone you just met? If you answer affirmatively to these questions, surely it is because you are a shy person.

A shy person is defined as someone who experiences extreme shame and insecurity in most of their social interactions. In fact, they often have a chronic fear of carrying out actions such as having a conversation with someone or approaching people who are not usually part of their social circle, as they think they will end up making a fool of themselves. It is normal that finally, when something as simple as going out with your friends or meeting new people costs you so much, there comes a time when you can not stand this situation and you wonder how to stop being shy . In we care about you and therefore, in the following article we will give you some tips that will help you improve your personality. Keep reading!

Find out where your shyness comes from

The first step to stop being shy is to try to understand what are the triggers that cause this feature, since it is quite difficult to combat something you do not know. In this way, you will be able to observe which thoughts are the ones that precede those emotions of discomfort and insecurity and prevent them from becoming a pattern of behavior.

To make it much simpler, you can try to make a list of the situations in which you are more timid and that produce you that shame or anxiety, that is, the circumstances in which you react with shyness. If you do not have very clear how to prepare this list, then we will help you to complete it by answering this series of questions:

• Do I react in a timid way every time I go to a social event occasionally or is it something that always happens to me?
• Am I afraid to interact only with people I do not know?
• In a conversation with friends, do I avoid talking or giving my opinion because I think I'm going to make a fool of myself?
• Do I feel this shame or insecurity only with people who attract or admire me?

Admit that you are a shy person

The next step to stop being shy is precisely to recognize that you are. For example, if you are with someone you have just met or with a group of friends where there are new people you can say something like: "If I do not talk much it is because I am a shy person and it is hard for me to express my opinions". In this way, we will be taking a little seriousness of the matter and you will be more relaxed, practically unconscious, since you will not have to make a great effort to hide how you are.

It is very common to fall into the error that when something of our personality we do not like, try to fight against that trait or emotion, when in reality we should try to accept ourselves as we are and if we want to modify it to a certain degree, for example if we want to be less shy, then work it.

Increase your self-esteem to stop being shy

It is very common for many shy people to have a tendency to underestimate themselves or to have a negative assessment of oneself. This is seen, for example, when there is a debate between friends and that person chooses not to intervene in the conversation because he is extremely afraid of being rejected and even humiliated. That is to say, he is taking for granted that his opinion or his way of seeing things does not have the same value as that of others.

If you feel identified with it, it is very important that you dedicate some work to increase your self-esteem and begin to love you more. The more security and more valuable you create, the less shy you will be in the future, although the opposite extreme is not healthy either.

We recommend this other article about How to increase your self-esteem.

Do not be so self-demanding

Being self-critical and self-demanding is not bad, as it helps you see your mistakes and learn from them. However, it is also an error to submit to constant self-criticism because there will come a time when the expectations that you have formed yourself are impossible to achieve. Perfectionism is also a common trait in shy people and is characterized by being highly demanding of yourself and seeing even the slightest mistake in something we have done.

To stop being shy, it is also essential that you are not so perfectionist and self-demanding, since too high levels of demand will only reduce your self-esteem and prevent your development and you feel fulfilled. Remember that humans have failures.

Do activities that help you stop being shy

In addition to the previous tips, another very useful recommendation for those who need to correct this trait is to look for activities that help increase self-confidence such as dancing, theater or learning a new language. In this way you will learn to do something new and also to interact with new people who share the same interest for that particular activity so you will feel more receptive when it comes to sharing your opinions.

You can also start practicing a new sport or going to a gym, because this way you will be increasing your safety, you will reduce stress and anxiety and you will also be able to meet new people.